Thursday, 10 July 2008

What Recovery Means To Me - Kerry Manley

When addiction strikes a loved one, the consequences are often severe for the rest of the family. They have to watch as someone they love changes into something they can hardly recognise. Feelings of helplessness, worry, even anger for what the rest of the family is going through, are the norm.

Kerry Manley first decided to get involved with Wired In after her son, Kevin, became a volunteer with us. That was over two years ago now, and we have had the pleasure of watching Kerry and Kevin rebuild their lives and their relationship.

Kerry volunteers with Wired In as she wants to help other family members understand more about addiction. But most importantly she wants to give others hope that addiction can be overcome and life can go on. Kerry has filmed her personal story with us, in conjunction with Kevin, and has also done other filmed and written projects with us. For more information about Kerry, and her experiences of addiction and recovery, please visit Our Community.

When you meet Kerry, you instantly realise what a gentle, loving person she is. It is also evident that what she went through with her son impacted on her greatly. Here she talks about a happier topic, that of ‘What Recovery Means To Me’. Feel free to comment and share your experiences and views with us.


Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing your experience and hope about Kevin's recovery. Families suffer terribly from addiction and need to recover too. Not every service is able to help with this, but there are support groups including Alanon and Families Anonymous which know all about addiction's pernicious effect on family members.

Thanks for your courage and gratitude.

Anonymous said...

"To me, recovery means having your life back, not being governed by the addiction. When
in recovery, thought processes change and a sensation of freedom and joy develops."

Kerry, In those few words you have defined recovery more clearly than I could ever hope to have done. In it's simplicity there is a real sense of unconditional love and understanding.

You have also shown us how the disease of addiction inflicts itself on the families of addicts. Thank you.

Recovery a personal view: Part 5.

Addiction has been defined as a mental and behaviour disorder. However, most people use drugs in order to change the way the feel, which adds the third dimension of spirituality. It follows that unless all three dimensions are addressed, recovery is incomplete.

That view is reinforced by Prochaska et al, who emphasis, that the journey recovery is unpredictable. That being the case, this writer believes that the ‘bridge’ spanning the road between addiction and the beginning of the healing and recovery process needs more than one pillar to support it if, the intractable nature of addiction is to be successfully put into lasting remission.

David Clark said...

It was lovely to hear your thoughts. There is something special in Kevin, something that I can truly see. However, I never knew him beforehand so I cannot compare. Both of you have come through so much and your experiences and views are so important.
You are one hell of a special lady, Kerry. I can't wait to see you again and spend some time talking through with you where you are and where you want to go.
The years ahead will be special.
And we can all give something to help other family members who are hurting so much.
A chilled DC from Paradise (Broome, NW Australia)

tim1leg said...

Kerry thankyou so much for highlighting that familys and communitys suffer. For some more than the active addict and that suffering can also go on during the addicts recovery if the support is not there, familys and communitys can also recover when the addict is still active too. This is why many of us advocate for services for those affected, after reading your story, I am sure you and kev will continue to heal and build your family and community together. Big hug Annemarie x

Kev said...

Thankyou Mam for everything you have done for me in my 30 years, especially the support and unconditional love you gave me in my dark years.

You're 1 in a 1,000,000


Anonymous said...

Dear Kerry, what a wonderful uplifting account of "What recovery means to you!" You are very unique individual to be so understanding, special mother for Kevin, so much needed for the addict at what ever stage of our recovery? I have learnt through time it is a family illness, yet all my family wanted! was to see me get well, I wanted them to understand the illness, in reality for them this they could not or would not go their. We the addicts need wisdom from the family members and loved ones how addiction is? a family illness, affecting all in a cunning and baffling way. i envy your son Kevin. Best wishes xx